Valerie Bertinelli Shares Insights on Relationship Growth and Empathy

Feb 18, 2025 at 9:35 PM

In a heartfelt Instagram post, the former Food Network star reflects on her personal experiences and offers thoughtful advice on fostering healthier relationships. After parting ways with her ex-boyfriend Mike Goodnough in November 2023, Valerie Bertinelli has been introspective about the dynamics that can either strengthen or weaken a partnership.

Bertinelli emphasizes the importance of approaching conflicts with empathy rather than criticism. She notes that when one feels hurt and believes they deserve an apology but encounters resistance from their partner, it might be due to underlying feelings of shame. Instead of focusing solely on what the other person did wrong, she suggests trying to understand their perspective. "It's crucial to ask yourself how you're bringing up the issue," she writes. "Are you only pointing out their mistakes, being overly critical, and expecting them to fix everything? This approach often makes things worse."

Bertinelli advocates for a more compassionate dialogue, suggesting that expressing feelings rather than assigning blame can lead to positive changes. "Instead of saying, 'You always do this!' try sharing how you feel when something happens and ask if you can work through it together," she advises. "This small shift can make a significant difference." She also highlights the importance of working with your partner rather than against them, acknowledging that mutual effort is essential for growth.

Reflecting on her own past, Bertinelli acknowledges the challenges she faced in previous relationships, including two failed marriages. Despite these setbacks, she remains optimistic about the potential for improvement. "Looking for ways to support each other is a form of love language," she concludes. "Even when you feel wronged, remember that everyone wants to do better. Relieving someone you love from shame can help them provide the amends you seek."

Bertinelli's reflections come three months after ending her relationship with Goodnough. Her candid words serve as a reminder that vulnerability and empathy are key components in nurturing stronger, more resilient connections. By fostering understanding and patience, individuals can create environments where both partners feel heard and valued, ultimately leading to healthier and more fulfilling relationships.