In a thought-provoking discussion sparked by the social media series “Subway Takes,” hosted by comedian Kareem Rahma, experts and adults alike are reconsidering the traditional question posed to children: “What do you want to be when you grow up?” Psychologist Ariel Kornblum argues that this common inquiry places undue pressure on young minds, pushing them toward a narrow view of identity tied to career paths. Instead, she supports alternative questions that encourage curiosity, imagination, and emotional awareness. Suggested alternatives include asking kids about their passions, values, or dreams outside of work. The conversation highlights the importance of allowing children to explore who they are without the burden of adult expectations. This shift in focus—from future roles to present identity—can foster healthier psychological growth and self-awareness.

Rethinking How We Engage Children About Their Futures

In a recent episode of the viral social media series “Subway Takes,” comedian Kareem Rahma and entrepreneur Sinead Bovell challenged the long-standing tradition of asking young children what they want to be when they grow up. Filmed during a candid train ride in New York City, the segment quickly gained traction online after suggesting that such a question imposes adult notions of productivity too early on developing minds. Rahma humorously proposed that people shouldn’t even consider answering that question until their 40s, while Bovell emphasized how children naturally think beyond careers. Their dialogue inspired a wave of supportive comments from viewers, educators, and parents across the country, many of whom shared alternative ways to engage kids. Among the suggestions were imaginative prompts like “What do you enjoy doing for fun?” and “How would you make the world better?” Ariel Kornblum, a licensed psychologist based in Manhattan, praised these rephrased inquiries as more meaningful tools for nurturing emotional intelligence and intrinsic motivation in youth.

Promoting Healthy Identity Development Through Thoughtful Conversations

From the perspective of a curious observer, this evolving dialogue around childhood development raises an important question: Are we shaping children into well-rounded individuals or simply grooming them for future job markets? By shifting our conversations with kids from rigid career expectations to open-ended explorations of their interests and values, we allow space for authentic self-discovery. Rather than planting the seed that personal worth is linked to professional titles, we can instead foster environments where creativity, empathy, and critical thinking flourish. As one school principal noted, even asking a child who they don’t want to become can reveal surprising insights. Ultimately, this cultural shift encourages us to see children not just as future workers, but as evolving human beings deserving of understanding and support in every stage of their journey.